Back on the mother land

Somehow by God's great mercy and grace I made it back from my vacation.

Barely.

After this week, I am amazed that I have any hair left in my head.

However, I can say that I have a whole new respect for single parents, now that I have survived a whole 5 days as one.

How do I not have a stomach ulcer, I don't know.

Not to mention that we had a two year old with us as well.

Whoever thought that dragging those two angels everywhere, rain or shine, nap time or not, through the blazing Georgia and South Carolina sun, needs a really good, UNENJOYABLE butt spanking.

I guess I'll get in line now.

Not to mention flying with a very active, crawling infant, who is trying to get over a sickness, is borderline wrist slashing worthy.

AKA Suicide.

Oh, and did I mention that our first flight coming back was 1hr late, which means that I was the completely ridiculously looking fool running from one side of O'Hare to the other, holding an infant with one arm and using the other to push the stroller, just so I won't miss my second flight?

I have never ran so fast in my life.

And I ran track in high school.

And did I also mention that while I was running Giada kept on pushing my jeans down so a good half of my lower back crack was showing for all united nations to see?

If you see a youtube video of some crazy woman's behind showing while she's running through the airport, there is a good chance it's me.

Not my finest moment.

But it was all worth it.

Because...

Two minutes after I got on the plane they closed the door.

Which basically means that I missed spending a night in Chicago's finest airport WITH my tired screaming 9 month old, by TWO freaking minutes.

I would rather give up my little left pinkie toe, thankyouverymuch.

But all in all, we did make it back. Praise Jesus!

And good times were had, along with some great memories.

In case you didn't know, those southerners can make some mean food, y'all.

For freaking reals now.

Grits have never been appealing to me until I stepped foot on the South Carolina soil.

But you throw some delicious sauce on it, and you may find me licking my hands all the way up to my elbows.

Don't judge until you've tried it. Mmk?

The water was absolutely perfect, too!

We had a blast splashing around and enjoying the sun.

Giada has somewhat of a love-hate relationship with big bodies of water.

Here she is showing you the 'love' part of it, since I've decided we'll stay positive on this half of the post.

Just because I wouldn't want you to start drinking after reading the first part.

You are welcome.

Don't we look so innocent in this picture?

Don't be so easily fooled.

Because after watching 'The Proposal" on our first night there, we just HAD to give this part of the movie a try.

We may or may not know all the moves, and there may or may not be a permiscuous video of us somewhere.

Yes, we did laugh until we cried before, during, and after the production.

And yes, we did bust out our moves randomly throughout the day, especially in the morning when we were trying to wake someone up.

Go on. Be jealous now.

All the traveling drama, screaming tired children aside, I'm so glad that we were able to get together with those girls, and I can't wait until our next adventure.

Bring it!

Best days of my life

Somedays I look around and think about how much I'm going to miss those years. The ones that I'm living now. It feels like I've been waiting for them my entire life. There are times when I hold my breath as I let every single one of my pores get infused with this happiness that surrounds us, afraid at the same time that it could all be taken away from me in the blink of an eye. I don't want to take a hug from a loved one, a toothless smile, a breath of air, for granted.

I've lived through some dark days in my past. We all have. Some more then others. Not ALL were bad, but some really burned a hole in my heart. Those days... they were filled with tears, and hurt, and hate, and anger, and bitterness, and resentment. And sometimes, the simple thought of living one more day with all this pain was unbearable. But most of all, those days were filled with hope. Hope for a better future. Hope for love. Hope for true happiness.

I always knew that if I hung in there long enough, God was going to carry me through. Every night we (ok, so it may have been a monolog) would plan out my future until I fell asleep. And I could always feel Him whisper "Just trust Me, and everything will be ok." And I did.

Maybe that was the last bit of fight that I had in me, cheering me on. Or maybe God really knew that I needed to hear those words. Either way, I'm glad I listened. Because He never left my side and He filled my cup more than I could ever imagine.

I just want to take a moment to document those days. You know, in case my heart grows heavy one day, or my dementia really settles in. And who knows, I may even inspire someone along the way to live their happily ever after every day.

I wake up every morning next to a man that loves me with all his heart. Yes, we have our ups and downs just like any other couple. But he is my best friend, my companion, my biggest fan. The best part is that I feel the same way about him. We have a roof over our heads that we turned into a home. A home that is filled with love and peace, laughter and great times. And that's what I want our daughter to remember. Our daughter. What a blessing and huge miracle she is. She inspires me to be a better person every.single.day. And then there are all the little moments that make my heart skip a beat. All the holidays, the apple picking, the warm drinks, the parties with friends, my daughter calling me her 'mamma,' seeing how my husband's face light up in his role as a daddy, my mommy's eyes smiling when she's a grandma, my grandparents dancing like in the good old days. Yes. Those are definitely the best days of my life.

Maybe there was a reason for that pain in my past. Maybe God needed me to feel all that hurt so I would become a stronger person. Maybe it was so I could learn how to trust Him. Or maybe it's so I could truly appreciate what I have right now. Not just the sunny days. You know, the ones when your 2.5 children are happy, your picket white dream house is clean, and you're wearing your best J Crew outfit. No, not just those. But the ones that mold you. That put your character to test. The ones where you're tired because you've slept a total of 4hrs last night, and are covered in snot because your child is sick, but your heart is still full when she smiles and reaches her arms so you could pick her up for the zillion time that day. The ones where you're mad that your husband forgot to take the trash out for the second week in a row, but you're glad that he chose you to love and hold forever because he does such a damn good job at it. Even though your garage may smell like death for the next week. The ones where your house is turned upside down, but you're so thankful for the peace, the quiet, and happiness that it brings. And that's all I've ever dreamed about: peace and happiness.

If you're in a hard place in your life right now, I encourage you to never give up hope. Trust me on that one. Work hard, pray hard, believe hard. And most importantly, be still and always know that He is God.

A few things on a Friday

• For some reason this year, the pumpkin spice Starbucks tastes better than ever before. How is that even possible? I don't know. But it's like I'm sipping fall. And fall tastes GOOD.

• Speaking of Starbucks, I'm surprised they don't spit in my cup when I place my order. And if they do, I would rather be oblivious to that one. But it takes me about 1min to say it, and half a page to write. "Can I please have a Grande Pumpkin Spice Latte, 1/2 decaf, fat free milk, 120 degrees, with wippcream, caramel on top?" Let me guess. You're thinking 'Yep, they sure spit in your coffee.'

• I may be the last blogger alive that does not use google reader. Tell me why am I so confused on how to use it? I swear I'm not stupid, but someone, for the love, break it down for me.

• I've been thinking about doing a guest post series for a little while now. It's still a work in progress, but we shall see if I will follow through. I'm kind of excited about it.

• One of my bff whom I blogged about yesterday (the prego one), fell asleep while driving back from work and rolled her truck three times before losing consciousness. She's 19 weeks pregnant. She was told by multiple health providers that she would have been dead if she did not wear her seatbelt, or if she was a couple of inches taller, since the roof of her truck was smashed inward on the driver's side. I just about lost it when I heard about it. I truly believe that God was watching over them, and she walked away with only a really black eye and multiple bruises. His mercy endures forever. Amen and Amen.

• Last night I Skyped with two of my favorite bloggers and it was a blast. True story. I wouldn't lie to you. Both LeAnna and Emily are so witty, funny, and full of wisdom. And in case you are wondering, our TWO hr. conversation covered everything from saggy, stretchy boobs, to food, to God and today's church. Yes, we are THAT diverse. And yes, we are THAT deep. Now you shall run over and befriend them as well.

• It cracks me up when some bloggers feel like they are celebrities just because they have a larger number of followers nowadays. I mean, you can literally see how that has changed their attitude bc all of a sudden they feel more important. You can say all you want that you're humble and genuine, because sista' girl, you isn't, and at the end of the day, you use the same brand of wipes to wipe your kid's dirty behind, that I do.

• I am already thinking about all the different types of food that I need to buy for next week's plane ride. I am praying that if I shove enough food in Giada's mouth and keep her fed at all times she'll 1) Not be able to scream, and 2) Won't want to crawl allover the place. Now, how much food does one need for a total of 8hr flight if one plans on stuffing her child's face with it constantly?

I hope your weekend is nothing short of fabulous!

Sistas'

In one week from now I'm doing the unthinkable.

I'm jumping on a plane and flying across the country with my infant.

For 8 hrs.

And this is a crawling, always on the go, hates being on my lap, infant we're talking about.

Excuse me while I start pulling my hair out this very second.

Can I say that there is being scared crapless and then there are my nerves.

Above the crap.

So you may ask yourself...

"Woman, what has possessed you to put your nerves, hair, and bowels, through such a dramatic event."

The answer my friends is... My sistas.

Ok, so they are not my real blood sista's... but they may as well be.

'Cause I would love them just as much.

Have you ever had a friend that you may not talk to for a few months, but when you do you pickup where you left off?

That's us.

During our college days, the three of us were inseparable.

We spent many a sleepless nights together.

Sometimes, there were weeks where we would spend every hour of the day with one another.

We did everything short of holding hands when peeing together.

Laughed, cried, and grew up together.

We were at and in each other's weddings.

There for when the first one of us had her very first baby.

We love each other's kids like they were our own...

{Can you believe that the one on the right is my little monkey? Was she really that little once? Fainting moment.}

And become the coolest aunts by giving someone's daughter chocolate for the first time while her mommy is not looking.

Life has moved us in different sides of the country, but we're still just as close.

And next week, we're all gathering together in Savanna and pick up where we left off.

Plus some screaming kids, I imagine.

Regardless, it should be a pretty fabulous time.

I love those girls.

They mean so much to me and I'm so glad God placed them in my life.

Both of them are some of the best human beings I have ever known.

They are kindhearted, funny, full of life, loyal, and love God with all their hearts.

I'm a better person because of them.

And that's the honest to God truth.

9 Months

My sweetest Joli-bear,

Nine months. Goodness child, your baby days are slipping through my fingers and I can’t do a darn thing about it. Every single day I look at you and can’t believe how much you look more and more like an actual toddler and less like a baby. It’s such a bittersweet feeling. I am trying to treasure those baby moments that you and I spend together, because I’m sure that before I know it they’ll be gone.

This month you’ve been such a little busy body. You’re going allover the place, following me through every room in the house, walking along the furniture, leaving little greasy handprints on everything you touch, and going up the stairs like it’s a marathon.

You’re still breastfeeding as well as having some supplemental formula (since momma’s wells are going more and more dry since she started working) 3 to 4 times per day.You’ve also been eating all kinds of solid food. Everything we’re having, you’re begging to eat as well. Girlfriend, you’re a bottomless pit! If you could, you would eat all.day.long. We’re still monitoring you very closely. You know, just until you get this whole ‘eating without choking’ thing under control. But every day you’re getting better and better at it, and you LOVE LOVE LOVE variety and flavor. I cross my fingers and pray everyday that your zest for flavor, food, and life, never leaves you.

With all this food you’re eating, I’m so surprised that you’re still so tiny. You weigh a little over 16lbs, which puts you in the 10th to 25^th percentile for weight. However, you’re still in the 75^th percentile as far as height goes. Which makes you tall and skinny I guess. You’re already living your mother’s dream.

So remember how last month you started saying ‘ma-ma’ all day long? Well, I’m not sure what happened, but for the last few weeks no matter how much I beg or try to bribe you, I cannot get you to say it again if my life depended on it. On the other hand, you say ‘Dada’ all the time. You don’t connect it to your daddy yet, but it’s good practice for when you do.

You’ve also started clapping your little hands a few weeks ago. Whenever you hear any song or when mommy says “Bravo Giada!” you clap as loud as you can with this huge smile on your face, so proud of what you have accomplished.

Thank you so much for coming into our lives and filling them with joy, meaning and beauty Little Love. Thanks to you, no matter how hard my day is, at the end of it I still have a smile on my face because you put it there.

I love you to the moon and back,

Forever yours,

Mommy.

My lover is getting old(er)

This week was my lover's birthday.

I am not quite sure how or why, but every year, I seem to love this man o' mine a lil bit more.

It sure ain't got nothin' to do with the extra 35 pounds he put on since we've got married.

Not that I hold it against him...

It's probably because we're starting the 'growing old' phase.

I'm doing the 'growing' and he's taking care of the 'old' part in this game...

just in case you were wondering.

With each passing year, we're learning how to communicate better with one another...

having more inside jokes...

drive each other more nuts...

work on growing more grey hairs...

watch our daughter grow...

learn about God's forgiveness, grace, and infinite blessings...

love each other deeper...

and live our dreams everyday... together.

There are not enough words to explain how grateful I am that God threw us together and sealed this whole deal with a 'for better or worse' for the rest of our lives.

Gosh, did Jesus ever know how to pick a man for me!

Even our genes look good together.

I mean, seriously...

Have you seen our kid?

Here she's keeping her cousins entertained by making them chase her through the grass at her daddy's party, while all the adults were just chatting away.

Don't worry. Our dog was baby-sitting.

She's 9, which makes her like 63 in dog yrs, so we knew we could trust her.

I also may or may not have completely defiled Pinterest for food ideas for this party.

I have found that if you put fruits in waffle cones, the kids will think you're the coolest aunt.

Ok, maybe not THE coolest... but pretty high up there.

The mexican style eggrolls were also very popular, especially for those like my husband and his family, and friends who have beans, cheese, and hot sauce running through their veins.

Which leaves us with dessert.

Listen to me good now, and hold on to your seats.

'Cause this deal is Sa-weet!

Are you listening?

Easy-peazy NO bake, super cute,

Cheesecake in a Jar y'all!

Oreo crust and cherry topping in one.

AND

Pumpkin in the other.

Mercy.

Now, hand one of those heart attacks in a jar to any kid and/or adult and you'll be their favorite person for at least a few hrs.

This birthday boy was pretty happy with his day.

We partied late into the night celebrating.

Ok, so maybe it wasn't so much night but rather later afternoon... and we were in bed, passed out by 10pm.

But who's keeping track?

That's how we role now in our older days.

And we're totally satisfied with it.

Here's to many more birthdays together!

I hope all of you have a beautiful weekend!

Picture this

This weekend has been filled with

Puffs eating...

Starbucks drinking,

Hot air ballon watching,

Little toesies paining,

Daddy lovin'...

Weed pulling...

And...

Trouble making...

I'm exhausted. But my heart is so full and thankful.

Brandon's birthday is tomorrow, but we'll be busy celebrating it today.

Don't worry, you'll hear all about it soon enough.

I hope you all have a beautiful Labor Day!

Mommyhood discoveries

OH Lo have mercy!

Have I been gone for a whole week and then some?

I apologize. Yet again.

Please still love me and don't think about leaving?

I wish I could come up with a better excuse, but work has been sucking the life out of me.

But soon my friends. Very, very soon...

I'll be joining you more often once again.

Pinky promise.

Because my part-time days are right around the corner, and I'm jumping out of my skin with excitement.

Sooo.... what have we been up to since last time you've heard from me?

Well...

Last Sunday we went to the most awaited end of summer event.

The Fair.

Every year I wait all summer for this week.

And it's not just so I can stuff my face with deep fried,well...everything.

Even though that's the biggest reason.

Just keeping it reals.

But it's also bc, to me, the fair brings in this familiar small-town feel of community, great memories and belonging.

I love it.

Until this year.

This year, I wanted to take all that mushy "small-town feel" mumbo jumbo and tell whoever came up with it to shove it where the sun don't shine.

It was over 100 degrees out there, and I think I lost about 4lbs in sweat that day.

My clothes were drench and sticky, and the armpity body odor in the air was almost as strong as the smell of the deep friend foods.

See, usually, we would go to this much awaited for event in the evening, when it's much much cooler out there.

But this year? Well this year we've got a new addition to our family and we had to go by her schedule.

As I was feeling the beads of sweat waterfalling of my derrière (I only wish I was joking about that one), waiting for the rest of the 'crew' to get done having fun on all the rides, I looked down at Giada and thought...

Oh my gosh. I'm that mom.

Before having her, I was looking at all those other moms and didn't understand how they would let their lives be ran by a snotty, incontinent, infant.

After all, they came into OUR world, so they must abide by OUR rules.

Can you believe I was that naive once upon a childless time?

I used to think that I could have a child and still do all the things that I did in my previous life time...

I am not a huge partier, don't drink, and our friends are pretty domesticated themselves...

As in no real party animals around here.

Therefore, I should be able to drag my child with me wherever I go, and she'll just adjust to the situation.

Right?

WRONG sucka!

Because her bed time is 8pm, which means that's now my curfew time.

She takes naps every two hrs after she wakes up, and eats every four hrs with snacks in between, and if you try to drag her around town, or have a lunch date, you better make sure that you take those things into consideration.

Unless your idea of a good time is a screaming, whiny, nothing-makes-her-happy, you-wanna-pull-your-hair-out-by-the-roots baby.

Then sure, you can drag her along all you want.

And then there are all the things that the rest of your childless friends are doing every weekend that you really can't do with a kid at this age.

Including but not limited to backpacking, free water rafting, tubing the river and traveling for more than a few hrs at a time.

Oh, and let me mention that around here, beside my SIL, all of our friends are childless.

{Sarah, if you're reading this... For crying out loud woman, get your freak on! I need some more mommas on my team! Thanks in advance.}

And babysitter are few and far between...

Not to mention that I 'save' all my babysitting calls for when I'm in total desperate need of one.

And also, I have this separation anxiety, slash, attachment issue with my girl, that is almost unhealthy, and never want to leave her side.

So yeah.

I'm that mom.

The one who's schedule is ran by her infant.

The one that every once in a while want's to pull her hair out and eat it.

The one who's in desperate need of a break.

The one who sometimes misses the freedom that she had pre her baby days.

The one who would give those things up a million times over in a heart beat for the life she has now.

Because the final truth is?

My daughter has more than quadrupled the amount of joys any of those other things could bring into my life.

So how about you?

What's your take on motherhood (childless friends)?

Is motherhood the way you thought it would be (mommas) ?